O.C. Story

So, I don't know if you guys have seen the movie "L.A. Story" with Steve Martin and Sarah Jessica Parker. Its from the early 90's, and its always been that one random movie I saw, that I never ever forgot. Anyways, in the movie, Steve Martin has these conversations with a billboard off the freeway. Or not so much conversations, as the sign gives him these messages and he gets frustrated trying to decode them and ends up screaming back at the sign. Random, I know... but I loved it. Seriously, such a great love story. And ever since I can remember, I've always had my own little "O.C. Story" with a sign off the 55 freeway. Orco Construction Supply. Who woulda thunk it? The messages change randomly, and by randomly, I mean they always happen to change at the right time in my life. When I'm feeling sad, the messages always seem to be one to lift me back up. If I'm falling into a rut, its something motivational to get my butt back in gear. When I feel like I am overwhelmed, it reminds me that "in order to get the rainbow, you have to deal with the rain." It has become a marker on my road home. The halfway point. And I look at it, without fail, every time I drive on the 55. 

Well, lately I've been getting kind of annoyed that they haven't changed it. Although, " we must become the change we want to see" is one of my favorite quotes... it had been months and I was ready for a new one. And the message I got the other day, was the toughest message of all. Orco Construction Supply has gone out of business. Say WHAT?!

Now I am fully aware that we are in the midst of a recession, but seriously, what the freak?! I've already cut back on so much. I recycle everything, I grow my own veggies, I've found ways to "repurpose" the clothes in my closet.. and now my sanity is being "recessed". Wonderful. 

So, now that I can no longer get inspirational quotes from my sign, I'll just end this with an inspirational quote from the movie, "L.A. Story"... it all comes full circle, doesn't it?

"There's someone out there for everyone-- even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them."

Hope the recession isn't hitting all of you too hard. Stay strong, my friends. We'll get through this.

Ladies & Gentlemen... Meet BUDDERS!

I seriously can't get enough of this little man's face. Those baby blues. The little "Stephen Colbert" ears... Who would have thought my grumpy brother could create such a happy baby! Haha, just kidding, Chris... Anyways, I just had to share these pictures. More bloggity blogging to come. ;)

He gets me every time...

Life.

Oh, Life. I think we need to talk. Just when I think I have a handle on you, you go and throw me for another loop. And today, you were in rare form. I must say, you almost had me. And then I have to remind myself that everything happens for a reason, and everything happens in its time. 

When I woke up this morning, I had the intention of having a nice, relaxing day off. Just a carefree day with my best friend, and a nice evening to myself. I've been stretched so thin lately and have been feeling so run down. I thought, just one day, and I'll be back in the game. And that's pretty much where it went wrong. 

For starters, I woke up on the right side of the bed, but way too late. Luckily, someone called me to wake me up. Unfortunately, it was my daily dose of negativity from my "friend". He was calling to tell me he woke up at 3 am with a pounding headache, like the one I had a few days ago. Although he didn't actually say the words, I'm pretty sure he was blaming me for it. So the right side of the bed, was now quickly turning into the wrong foot.

I was intending to be at my friend's house, in Cypress, by 11:30. But around 12 I was still at home getting my things together. Call it procrastination, but in retrospect, now I just call it fate. Had I gotten out of the house any earlier, I wouldn't have seen little Bax wake from his slumber, cry a yelp of pain, and run out of the house. I would not have found him hiding in the backyard. I would not have wondered why he was acting so strange. And most importantly, had I left any earlier, I would not have crossed paths with my brother to ask him to go see if Bax was merely acting like a brat, or if something was legitimately wrong with him. 

Because something was wrong with him. I didn't know it at the time, but Bax, the little detective, had gotten into some rat poisoning the night before. And the reason he was acting so strange, was that it was being digested in his body and slowly killing him. I didn't know this until I was in LA with my friend, and nowhere near my baby that was in trouble. 

I was trying to get a hold of everyone and anyone to check on him while I was gone. We were stuck in LA during rush hour traffic. So getting home soon wasn't an option. But no one was available. And then, my Dad saved the day. He was going to take Bax to the hospital and see what was wrong. I felt such a sense of relief, for a small moment, until my Dad called to say, "I just need you to brace yourself for the worst. I'm gonna take him to the hospital, but it doesn't sound good, Jamie.." And I felt powerless all over again. 

Its a funny thing. Although I did not birth Baxter, he is every bit a child to me. And I felt like the worst mother in the world. To not be there while he was in pain. To not be able to pet him and tell him that I love him and everything is gonna be okay. To not be there for his last breath. I was dying with him. And I kept telling myself, there's no way I can handle kids someday if I can't even handle this. 

But luckily, My Dad and Chris were there with him. And luckily, they had made it in time. After getting his stomach pumped and system flushed, he was gonna make it after all. But in his examination, they took x-rays and found that his whole back was bruised all over. My Dad and Chris had figured out later that a shelf that had the rat poison, and also laundry detergent bottles, had fallen on Baxter and that's how he got to it in the first place. Poor guy. Can't help the fact he loves to eat. 

So, in the end, it all worked out. And looking back over the day's events, I feel so lucky. What seems at times like mishaps and distractions, might actually be the very things that save you or the ones you love. Me and my brother haven't been on the best of terms lately. And Chris said that he wasn't even supposed to be home today, but he had two clients cancel on him. So had he not been home, I wouldn't have had anyone check on him. And would've come home to find the biggest heartbreak of all. But instead, I came home to my favorite thing ever. A wagging tail, and a wiggling bottom. And now, I have so much more love and gratitude for my brother and father. I have two men in my life that will drop everything and be there for me. And a puppy that won't stop kissing his Mommy.

Alright, Life. Maybe you're not so bad after all. 

Best one yet...

So, the other night I heard, in my opinion, the best pickup line. 

"Hi. I accept you for your facial scars. Do you accept me for mine?" 

Ladies, keep a lookout for your "Save the Dates"... this one's a keeper. Haha!

Indian Chief

So, the other day I called my brother to tell him to not take my mail out of the mailbox, to be lost in some random pile in his house, but leave it in the mailbox where I can retrieve it myself. It was never a problem with the previous tenants. Whoever picked up the mail, would deliver whatever mail wasn't theirs to the appropriate addressee. Seems simple. But this is my brother we're talking about here. I didn't know it then, but apparently, my brother was using my mail as hostage for me to visit. So not only do I get a guilt trip for not seeing enough of my nephew, but I also miss out on cool opportunities like baby showers, weddings, cable tv and, my personal favorite, car insurance. 

So as I'm giving my brother the new mail protocol, he cuts me off by saying, "Alright, Jamie, I gotta go.. I'm digging up a dead body right now." And honestly, I didn't even question it. My brother is the king of exaggeration and prank phone calls. So the "dead body" didn't even throw me for a loop. And, clearly, it should have. It turns out as my brother is working on this house, attempting to dig a sewer line, his shovel hits bones. He said this isn't unusual, most of the time they are animals though. Fountain Valley High School is built on old slaughterhouse carcasses. Goo. But in this case, he happened to find a human skull. And clearly, the remaining pieces of the skeleton. As my brother snaps into "CSI" mode, his two workers begin to freak out. Understandably so. One is off saying his "Aye Dios Mio's" while the other is dry heaving in the corner. Apparently the smell was too much. Goo, again. My brother continues to dig and pull out bones, laying them out on the ground in the appropriate places, so when the real CSI's come, they can do their work. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that would be tampering with evidence. But whatever, on with the story...

So, I'm sure you are all on the edge of your seat wondering what the heck a body is doing under a house, so here's the dish...

Apparently, it was the body of a 200 year old Indian Chief. Due to the jaw structure and color of the bones they were able to determine that. And due to some treaty or pact, they actually have to put the bones back where they found them. And not only that, but have to build and work around them. Call me crazy, but if that was my home, I don't know how cool I'd be with knowing my bedroom was built over some 200 year old guy's bones. And the craziest thing, is that all this happened in Long Beach. Its so hard to imagine that 200 years ago an Indian reservation with Chiefs like "Black Fox", medicine men, rain dances and herbal potions would later be the future home of Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre, booty shakin' and "Gin and Juice"... But hey, that's life! 

So, now my brother has a new calling. Other than being father, brother, prison warden, postman, and plumber.. he can also add archeologist to his belt. And me? Well, I'm just back slinging food and drinks for money. Who wouldn't want to be me?? :)

Remember...

Remember when I finally was getting along with my brother again. 

Remember when I wanted to sell Baxter because he wakes me up, every two hours, every night, like a newborn baby. Remember how Monty, my perfect dog, killed my brother's cat the day before Valentine's Day. Remember when my brother hated me again. 

Remember how I was really upset and needed support, so I turned to "my friend" and all he could tell me was "This never would've happened if you'd take your dogs out more often". Remember how I got pissed and ignored him. Remember how I left him a note saying "Happy Valentine's Day, you little brat" even though I wanted to call him a jerk, asshole, or prick. Pretty much something that would make him realize how mean he really is. Remember when he called to thank me, because he thought I was genuinely leaving him a Valentine. Remember when I got pissed and ignored him again. Remember how a day later we went to a movie and then cuddled and kissed on his couch. 

Remember how I signed up for eharmony. Remember how I thought I was unmatchable, and now I have over 150 men that are "the one". Remember when I received "gentle nudges" to start communication with them. Remember how eharmony called me a "skeptic". Remember how eharmony is stalking me. 

Remember how I'm going to be single forever, with my nocturnal and murderous dogs, living next door to my grumpy overprotective brother. 

My life is soooo cool.  

Insomnia

So, it seems lately I've had some trouble falling asleep at a normal hour. Hence me blogging at 12:15 Sunday night.. or I guess, technically, Monday morning. And normally I just read or watch tv till my eyes wear out and I finally doze off. But last week, I wasn't so lucky. I finally fell asleep around 5:30 am. Yes, I repeat, 5:30 am. I tried everything!  Watching all my DVR'd shows, balancing my checking account, blog-stalking, color-coordinating my closet, dusting my house, alphabetizing my DVDs, doing the dishes, and so on, I finally gave in and challenged my eyes to a competition. Who can stare at my eyelids longer? Righty always wins. Oh, and did I mention I also signed up for eharmony, as well. Oops, must've slipped my mind.. ;) 

Its those darn commercials. The song, the couples walking together and laughing, in slow motion. Why always in slow motion? I thought time was supposed to fly when you're having fun... but anyway, during my countless hours enjoying the tube, I always see those commercials, and think how cute that they found their match. So, I was curious, and a little mental from the lack of sleep, so I checked out the website. And before I know it, I'm in the middle of setting up a profile where they ask you a gajillion questions. No joke. It was intense. Questions like, if you were given too much change would you speak up about it.. and I was torn. Say I'm given .23 extra cents, odds are I'm probably not gonna bother. But $23.00, that's another story. I'd give it back. But how do you base a relationship on that question?? I kept wanting to quit, but it'd say, 83% done, so I'd keep trucking on, only to find that 83% is nowhere near finished. And as I'm finishing the survey, I start to thinking about how you hear the horror stories of people rejected from these kinda things. They say that you are "unmatchable" or just plain "rejected". And then I freaked out. What if I'm a reject?!  Will I never have the opportunity to walk in slow motion?? Will I never laugh in slow motion? Oh dear! Am I cursed to travel this Earth at an ordinary, average pace?! But, then I was able to talk myself out of the freak out.. one of the bonuses of being a gemini, I guess.

So I went to bed that night not realizing what I had really done. Clearly due to the insomnia. And when I opened up my inbox Monday afternoon, it really hit me. Meet Brian. Meet Phil. Meet Mike. And so on, and so on.... everyday there are like 12 new guys. And everyday, I get more and more stressed about it. Number one, I have no idea who these people are. Stranger danger. Number two, I didn't pay for the service because it said I could see my matches for free. By "see" they mean, see everything but what they actually look like. So I have no idea what these guys look like. And call me superficial, but hey, looks matter. Not to me, but to my future children. Always thinkin' ahead... and Number three, am I really supposed to pay to meet a guy? And how much am I willing to pay?

So, as of now, I still haven't paid. Therefore I can't view pictures or communicate with any of these potential "slow motioners"... and I'm perfectly fine with it. Some of the guys seem really interesting. But are they just telling me what I want to hear.. or read, I guess. And others, I'm completely shocked they were paired with me. For example, the type of guy who answers all of his questions with the answer "my truck":

What are you most thankful for? My truck 

What are you passionate about? My truck

What can you not live without? My truck

Leisure activities? Washing my truck, driving my truck, and thinking about... my truck.

I wish I was kidding. In the beginning I was just excited I wasn't rejected by the website. Now I'm just wondering why this guy wasn't. I mean, its cute if you're a little boy. But not if you're 34. 

So needless to say, I'm hesitant about this little pickle I've gotten myself into. Maybe I'll give it a whirl for a month. Maybe I won't. All I know is, this girl needs her sleep. Especially if Mr. Right is patiently waiting somewhere in my inbox.